The simple bumper sticker that stuck in my craw

A bumper sticker from a week ago is still irritating me. I saw it on a Prius in the McDonald’s drive thru while ordering my breakfast of real champions, a McGriddle, which I’ll defend to my grave is the best breakfast sandwich in the world after eating over a 1,000 of them in recent years.

I'm eating one of these right now

Back to the bumper sticker, which read: “All you have is now.”

Harmless, you say. What’s the big deal? Exactly, I agree.

But then I started mulling it over in line, getting bothered by it, which may have been because I still hadn’t received my tasty goodness. Or, could it have been the bombardment of McDonald’s signs working me over to eat myself to an inner tube of jelly around my midsection?

Beef and bacon covered ice-cream sundaes, coffee desserts, quadruple burgers covered in chocolate, 50 oz. sugary smoothies, 10-pound bags of french fries covered in candy sprinkles and cheddar cheese.

The reason the bumper sticker bothered me was because the “all I have is now” attitude got me in a lot of trouble years ago. And because I have a daughter now, which made want to change the bumper sticker to the following: “All you have is now, but your children have tomorrow, Jackass.”

Clearly, when I see anything talking to me, it calls me Jackass, which is appropriate after a 1,000 McGriddles.

Here’s the rub.

We have a lot of conversations at our dinner table about the future of the planet: Oil production is peaking, global ice is melting, a very large pool of plastic is floating north of Hawaii, our natural food supply contains harmful chemicals, we’re getting bigger and have more ailments, and Earth can’t support its predicted population growth.

All of this adds up to a potentially bleak future, which is a post for the future, if I had one, which apparently I don’t according to the Prius driver.

So, when I see a bumper sticker “All you have is now” on a Prius, which is ironic as that car is better for the environment than most, I feel that’s the attitude that got us stuck in this mess in the first place and that if more people made harder choices and put the future higher on their priority list we’d be in a better place.

By the way, I’m doing my part by not taking as many showers and wearing the same clothes for a week, which saves water and keeps more detergent from flowing into the water supply or ocean. My wife clearly has mixed feeling about my strategy.

Back to the bumper sticker. Maybe I misread it. Maybe it meant “all you have is now to make a difference and that’s why I’m driving a Prius and not an oversized SUV, Jackass who eats McGriddles every day.”

It didn’t say that. But for my own sanity, I’m going to pretend it did and let it go.

There, done. It’s off my mind. I feel better now. Go about your day. There’s nothing to see here. Insane man back to enjoying the weekend. You do the same.

6 thoughts on “The simple bumper sticker that stuck in my craw

  1. I must admit I’m not really a dog man, so the last few posts haven’t really done it for me (although its been good to read about you having fun)

    This one is back to the Unknown I love – thoughtful and rude rolled into one. Goodschizzle – more like these please 🙂

  2. While I, unlike Matt and Sandra, remain completely enamored with Cali California and all of your related (mis)adventures, this rocks. I agree 100%, though the whole “all you have is now” and “live for today” crap irritates me on several other levels, namely, if I lived that way I would never do another treatment again, and do a lot of other selfish and irresponsible things – which, coincidentally, I find to be the general behavior pattern of most similarly smug, faux-yogis who run around saying shit like that. I can handle the “CARPE DIEM, BRO!” keg-standing frat boy much more easily than the aforementioned self-righteous refuse-to-plan-ers. Which Mr/Mrs/Miss Prius very well may not have been – but the juxtaposition of the Prius at McDonald’s leaves me with my doubts.

    Why must we think so much about stuff other people don’t even notice? Damned monkey minds 🙂

    • Jessica,

      Thank you. What’s life without some dogs in it? I’m also happy you see the truth in my post. I should have got out of my car and ripped the damn bumper sticker off the Prius. That would have taught them.

      Thanks for the visit and crazy comment, which I liked, as always.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s