What a drag it is getting old

20110408-095120.jpgThe Rolling Stones were wrong. It’s not a drag getting old. It is a drag getting old and being sick. It’s not a drag getting old when you’re Mick Jagger and you spend your days selling your songs to companies for money you’ll never have time to spend before your hourglass runs empty of sand. Perhaps, for Mick, it’s a drag getting old and being a sell-out. Probably not.

So, last night, in the hospital, I thought, just thought for a moment, that I should peel myself off the sheeted rubber mattress and drive to the ER. I hit 9.5 on the pain scale, with sun face and lower back pain and a general feeling that I might not make it through the night. That is never a pleasant thought, especially when you’re already in a hospital.

Would the nurse enter the room later in the night to discover my exploded remains covering the newly painted walls? I hope they have more Behr Sand Cream and Cape Cod Millionaire Blue paint sitting around.

After the doctors disappear when the sun goes, it’s keeping you alive time. Despite me catching on fire last night, did I see a doctor? Luckily, I had a great nurse.

This is a hard disease and there are a lot of moving pieces.

Today, my creatinine was higher and the doctor said he would lower the Tobra dose. Was the dose changed when it showed up? Of course not. Sometimes, I feel like it is best not to be proactive and to just succumb to medical system and it’s slowness and possible mistakes. But I can’t give up control – yet. That scares me more than death.

6 thoughts on “What a drag it is getting old

  1. When it comes to the medical system – don’t ever give up on being a control freak… the system is filled with lots of freaking idiots. Other stuff you can give up on being a control freak…

    Sending (((hugs)))
    I’ll be thinking of you when I’m fundraising tomorrow!

  2. I’m sorry you’re going trough all this 😦 My doc encourage me to drink as much as possible water when i am on the kidney-nasties. Hope you will sleep better coming night. Big virtual hugs from Belgium

  3. Keep on fighting – you will come out of this one mate. People are doing stuff with the potion i sent you as well. Will keep you in the loop – The first signs are VERY promising. You might need to fire up that rocket ship this year.

  4. It breaks my heart to hear that you are so, so sick 😦 It’s almost as if the positive juju I’ve been sending isn’t doing the trick. I hope this is a getting worse before getting better type situation. The getting better part must be just around the corner.

  5. I agree with Stacey- my heart is breaking too, and I’m certain that good days are just around the corner. Hopefully, the red face will mellow into a gorgeous Cabo tan. Then you’ll have even more trouble fending off the women.

    Please, please feel better UC.

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