10 things I don’t want to hear from my PICC line nurse

I’m going through man-a-pause. No, that’s not on the list, but it should be.

It was all I could do today to keep from using ALL CAPS in my tweets. The number of tweets I didn’t send was higher than the number I sent. I told CF-mum Lorraine I dug her. I started three blog posts and stopped. Strange day.

I also listened to Captain and Tennille’s Love Will Keep Us Together and enjoyed it.

So, when in doubt, go with frivolity and horseplay.

10 things I don’t want to hear from my PICC line Nurse:

  1. Where did those buff arms go?
  2. Hellooooooooooooo, to my first solo insertion.
  3. Neck or groin? Tongue depressor or leather strap?
  4. Nursing school in Tahiti rocked, dude!
  5. Rambo never asked for a shot of lidocaine, dear. And he had to stitch his own arm.
  6. Does Red Bull ever make your hands shake like this?
  7. Do I feel warm to you?
  8. Mind if my lover, Bart, watches?
  9. It’s okay, 5-second rule in effect for dropped needles.
  10. Cystic fi-what? That can’t be good.
  11. (bonus) Holy crap! It is sticking out of your ear and I just . . . threw up in my mask.

______________________________________________________________________________

Advertisements

4 thoughts on “10 things I don’t want to hear from my PICC line nurse

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s